Monday, May 5, 2014

Conversations with Mr. Trainer: The Non-Gym Edition

I’m not one to relax.  It’s not in my vocabulary.  I like to think I can, but have been reminded by a lot of folks that I just can’t do it.  If something happens….especially with someone I care about deeply, I WILL obsess about it until it’s resolved.  My obsession was nuts on this one, because it matters in many different ways.

So, for those of you that read my Saturday blog, this is the Part 1 (because there's always a part 2) edition response.  48 hours of silence and today, I get a phone call around 10am while at work.

The phone rings….

Me: (I see his name and my heart drops.  So….I immediately go shut my office door and the feeling of dread creeps up.) “Hello?”


Me: “Ummm….hey, (insert his name here.)”

Mr. Trainer:  “First: I’m not mad at you.  I figured you had stuff going on, so I let it be.  I’ll make you spill it later.”

Me:  “  Ok…. “

Mr. Trainer: “Yeah, I know you worry too much.  So I’m calling you this morning because I KNOW you’re worried about seeing me tomorrow night.  Now you don’t have to be weird.  You're welcome.”

Me:  “ Well, thankssoverymuch for letting me worry all weekend!  I even had a dream that you would never allow me to train with you again!”

Mr. Trainer:  “Geez.  Women.  Can’t live without them and can’t stop loving them.  Drama, much?  GAH.  So, are you ok?”

Me: “Hmmm…..well, I can say that I will be.”

Mr. Trainer:  “Well, good – because if not, I’d just have to come see you and give you a wedgie or something.”

Me:  “Gross.  Boys are disgusting.”

Mr.  Trainer: “Yes.  Yes, we are.   I shall see you tomorrow and we will dominate.  Cardio and smart eating today, right?  RIGHT?  We’ve got this!”

Me:  “Yeah…ok.  GOD.  Stop telling me what to do!”

Mr. Trainer: "Aaaannnnd, she's back."

And……………just like that all is right with the world again.  FACT:  The difference between men and women = We have feelings……….and they equate them to wedgies.

Lord, help me.

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